Post by Lisa Snart on Jan 16, 2015 2:34:23 GMT
I'm literally copying this from tumblr, but these could be fun (or a disaster, I guess its up to us)
ODDLY SPECIFIC AUS I NEED
'we both got kicked out of our rooms because our roommates are having sex so now we're standing in the hallway avoiding each other' AU
'I heard you singing backstreet boys at 3am and decided to sing along oops' AU
' holy shit i'm in the wrong car' AU
LASER TAG AU
‘Omg I can’t believe you still listen to CDs let me help you digitize’ AU
' I know you steal my wifi to watch porn but it's kinda hot idk' AU
'My pet really hates your pet’ AU
' Customer that knows wayyyy more than the brand new employee please help me out' AU
'I was walking by the roller coasters and SOMEONE’S SHOE FLEW OFF AND HIT ME IN THE HEAD” AU
'dude i know we don't know each other but my swim trunks came off when i jumped in the water can you grab them for me' AU
”it’s 2am and i’m drunk and i need some goddamn french fries right now so open your fucking door’ AU
SWIM TEAM AU
'got mistaken for a celebrity by the celebrity's biggest fan' AU
'this person just fell asleep on me in the subway but they're cute so whatever' AU
'sorry i set the fire alarm in our building off again for the forty-eighth time i was trying to cook' AU
'so YOU'RE the douchebag who keeps mowing their lawn while i'm trying to sleep' AU
'I know nothing about camping will you help me i think i heard a bear' au
WINDOW WASHER AU
'we're literally the only two kids who ride this school bus maybe we should carpool or make out or something' AU
'I hired you off craigslist to be my date for a wedding' AU
’I’m a werewolf but I’m embarrassed to tell you because my wolf form is more like a chihuahua’ AU
'we both tried to rob a bank at the same time' AU
random aus that i just need. okay?
you belong to a rival team, but i’m falling head first for you and i’m trying my hardest to not throw the championship game away au.
i see you with the same person all the time and i assume you two are in a relationship so i’ll just pine for you from a distance au.
we’ve been together for a while now and i want to have a family with you but don’t know how to approach the topic since you made it pretty clear that you dislike children au.
we’re guildmates in an mmorpg and i’ve only ever heard your voice and i may or may not have jacked off to you just talking while i had my mic off. and now i accidentally forgot to turn it off and you heard me breathing hard moaning your name as i came on myself au.
you’re in the air force and i’m in the marines and deeply in love you, but i’m not sure if it’s possible for us to be anything because i just got my orders and i’ll be an ocean away from you au.
we met years ago when you helped me find my mom when i got lost in the mall and i never forgot your soft smile even after all these years au.
i work the late shift at the bar and you recently started being a regular during the evening, always looking like a wreck and one day i finally worked up the nerve to ask if you were okay. you tell me how you have twins and the mother left and you don’t know what to do so you’re drinking your problems away au.
you’re my tutor on a subject that i can easily ace but im only acting stupid because i really want to know how your lips taste and feel like against mine au.
i’m a famous actor and you’re a surly but passionate personal chef that i hired because my agent wants me to eat healthier and work out to build body mass for my next role, but i can’t cook to save a life. you seem to not know me or care in the slightest but i really want to get to know you for a multitude of reasons: you’re hot like burning, your food is like orgasm in my mouth, and because you genuinely fascinate me and i want to know your story au.
we go out for romantic dinner one night but get into a car crash and i lose five years of my memory. it’s like this for months, but you never gave up on me even when it looked like i would never get those years back. the morning after we have sex for the first time since the accident, i finally remembered au.
i’m a criminal detective investigating a murder and you’re a suspect. you definitely look the part of a murderer.. unfortunately. it should be illegal to be that hot and menacing au.
you and i meet at a bachelor/ette show with both of us hoping to get with, well, the bachelor/ette only to find and fall for each other au.
i lost a bet and i am a man of my word so here i am about to get a bikini wax for the first time. i knew it was going to be painful but what i wasn’t expecting was that a really hot guy going to do the waxing and now i’m trying failing to not get a hard on au.
i drunk dialed you one night and i think i asked you to come over to fuck me into the mattress and come on my face .. out of all the people i could have called while drunk and say those things, it just had to be the guy i had a crush on au.
our families loathe each other because we’re competing for the best pizza restaurant title and now they asked us to get close to each other to steal the opposing family’s secret. but the thing was that we’ve been together for months so we fake a fake relationship and give our family false information au.
Awkward First Meetings AUs
“My cat steals underwear and I come home to find you chasing my cat to get your underwear back.”
“I was imitating a fight scene off this anime I watched and accidentally hit you in the face.”
“This horrible umbrella won’t extend! Oh shit I just hit you in the stomach/crotch! I’m so sorry.”
“I needed a drink of water after my shower but I forgot that I opened the blinds to my balcony and you just saw me walk into my kitchen naked.”
“I just tripped and fell face first into your crotch, god end my life now please.”
“I drunkenly tried to fight you and knocked myself out but you were kind enough to take care of me till I woke up.”
“You have just witnessed me cry over the ending to my favorite game before class began please don’t ever tell anyone about this.”
“I thought you were my friend so I slapped your ass in greeting.”
“I sent a selfie of myself in the tub to the wrong number and you responded back with another selfie. Holy shit you’re really attractive.”
“You’re headphones aren’t plugged in all the way so I know you’re listening to educational children’s cartoon theme songs.”
“You just caught me reading hardcore smut fan fiction during class and you’re wondering how I can read this with a blank face.”
“You accidently broke my arm when you fell from a tree and landed on top of me.”
“I got my ass handed to me in SSB4 by this little kid and you were there to witness it.”
“I’ve never talked to you before but the teacher just used us as an example for a scenario where we are married.”
“Hello we are full grown adults fighting over this last balloon that’s shaped like a cats head.”
“I’m running late to school and you just hit me with your motorcycle cause you’re also late and no I don’t want to go to the hospital instead because I cannot miss this test just please give me a ride instead?”
“Please don’t tell anyone that I carry a stuffed animal around with me and even talk to it.”
“Hello I’m your boss and you’re the new employee who just saw me shove an entire cupcake into my mouth.”
“I’m watching The Lion King on my phone and I’m trying to hide the fact I’m sobbing uncontrollably but you notice anyway.”
“I was trying to ask for directions and you accidentally pepper sprayed me cause you thought I was your stalker.”
“Hey you called this number at like 3AM and we talked about some pretty heavy shit do you remember any of that?”
(Another link: cherub-sex.tumblr.com/post/93951329985/hugeass-list-of-aus)
ODDLY SPECIFIC AUS I NEED
'we both got kicked out of our rooms because our roommates are having sex so now we're standing in the hallway avoiding each other' AU
'I heard you singing backstreet boys at 3am and decided to sing along oops' AU
' holy shit i'm in the wrong car' AU
LASER TAG AU
‘Omg I can’t believe you still listen to CDs let me help you digitize’ AU
' I know you steal my wifi to watch porn but it's kinda hot idk' AU
'My pet really hates your pet’ AU
' Customer that knows wayyyy more than the brand new employee please help me out' AU
'I was walking by the roller coasters and SOMEONE’S SHOE FLEW OFF AND HIT ME IN THE HEAD” AU
'dude i know we don't know each other but my swim trunks came off when i jumped in the water can you grab them for me' AU
”it’s 2am and i’m drunk and i need some goddamn french fries right now so open your fucking door’ AU
SWIM TEAM AU
'got mistaken for a celebrity by the celebrity's biggest fan' AU
'this person just fell asleep on me in the subway but they're cute so whatever' AU
'sorry i set the fire alarm in our building off again for the forty-eighth time i was trying to cook' AU
'so YOU'RE the douchebag who keeps mowing their lawn while i'm trying to sleep' AU
'I know nothing about camping will you help me i think i heard a bear' au
WINDOW WASHER AU
'we're literally the only two kids who ride this school bus maybe we should carpool or make out or something' AU
'I hired you off craigslist to be my date for a wedding' AU
’I’m a werewolf but I’m embarrassed to tell you because my wolf form is more like a chihuahua’ AU
'we both tried to rob a bank at the same time' AU
random aus that i just need. okay?
you belong to a rival team, but i’m falling head first for you and i’m trying my hardest to not throw the championship game away au.
i see you with the same person all the time and i assume you two are in a relationship so i’ll just pine for you from a distance au.
we’ve been together for a while now and i want to have a family with you but don’t know how to approach the topic since you made it pretty clear that you dislike children au.
we’re guildmates in an mmorpg and i’ve only ever heard your voice and i may or may not have jacked off to you just talking while i had my mic off. and now i accidentally forgot to turn it off and you heard me breathing hard moaning your name as i came on myself au.
you’re in the air force and i’m in the marines and deeply in love you, but i’m not sure if it’s possible for us to be anything because i just got my orders and i’ll be an ocean away from you au.
we met years ago when you helped me find my mom when i got lost in the mall and i never forgot your soft smile even after all these years au.
i work the late shift at the bar and you recently started being a regular during the evening, always looking like a wreck and one day i finally worked up the nerve to ask if you were okay. you tell me how you have twins and the mother left and you don’t know what to do so you’re drinking your problems away au.
you’re my tutor on a subject that i can easily ace but im only acting stupid because i really want to know how your lips taste and feel like against mine au.
i’m a famous actor and you’re a surly but passionate personal chef that i hired because my agent wants me to eat healthier and work out to build body mass for my next role, but i can’t cook to save a life. you seem to not know me or care in the slightest but i really want to get to know you for a multitude of reasons: you’re hot like burning, your food is like orgasm in my mouth, and because you genuinely fascinate me and i want to know your story au.
we go out for romantic dinner one night but get into a car crash and i lose five years of my memory. it’s like this for months, but you never gave up on me even when it looked like i would never get those years back. the morning after we have sex for the first time since the accident, i finally remembered au.
i’m a criminal detective investigating a murder and you’re a suspect. you definitely look the part of a murderer.. unfortunately. it should be illegal to be that hot and menacing au.
you and i meet at a bachelor/ette show with both of us hoping to get with, well, the bachelor/ette only to find and fall for each other au.
i lost a bet and i am a man of my word so here i am about to get a bikini wax for the first time. i knew it was going to be painful but what i wasn’t expecting was that a really hot guy going to do the waxing and now i’m trying failing to not get a hard on au.
i drunk dialed you one night and i think i asked you to come over to fuck me into the mattress and come on my face .. out of all the people i could have called while drunk and say those things, it just had to be the guy i had a crush on au.
our families loathe each other because we’re competing for the best pizza restaurant title and now they asked us to get close to each other to steal the opposing family’s secret. but the thing was that we’ve been together for months so we fake a fake relationship and give our family false information au.
Awkward First Meetings AUs
“My cat steals underwear and I come home to find you chasing my cat to get your underwear back.”
“I was imitating a fight scene off this anime I watched and accidentally hit you in the face.”
“This horrible umbrella won’t extend! Oh shit I just hit you in the stomach/crotch! I’m so sorry.”
“I needed a drink of water after my shower but I forgot that I opened the blinds to my balcony and you just saw me walk into my kitchen naked.”
“I just tripped and fell face first into your crotch, god end my life now please.”
“I drunkenly tried to fight you and knocked myself out but you were kind enough to take care of me till I woke up.”
“You have just witnessed me cry over the ending to my favorite game before class began please don’t ever tell anyone about this.”
“I thought you were my friend so I slapped your ass in greeting.”
“I sent a selfie of myself in the tub to the wrong number and you responded back with another selfie. Holy shit you’re really attractive.”
“You’re headphones aren’t plugged in all the way so I know you’re listening to educational children’s cartoon theme songs.”
“You just caught me reading hardcore smut fan fiction during class and you’re wondering how I can read this with a blank face.”
“You accidently broke my arm when you fell from a tree and landed on top of me.”
“I got my ass handed to me in SSB4 by this little kid and you were there to witness it.”
“I’ve never talked to you before but the teacher just used us as an example for a scenario where we are married.”
“Hello we are full grown adults fighting over this last balloon that’s shaped like a cats head.”
“I’m running late to school and you just hit me with your motorcycle cause you’re also late and no I don’t want to go to the hospital instead because I cannot miss this test just please give me a ride instead?”
“Please don’t tell anyone that I carry a stuffed animal around with me and even talk to it.”
“Hello I’m your boss and you’re the new employee who just saw me shove an entire cupcake into my mouth.”
“I’m watching The Lion King on my phone and I’m trying to hide the fact I’m sobbing uncontrollably but you notice anyway.”
“I was trying to ask for directions and you accidentally pepper sprayed me cause you thought I was your stalker.”
“Hey you called this number at like 3AM and we talked about some pretty heavy shit do you remember any of that?”
(Another link: cherub-sex.tumblr.com/post/93951329985/hugeass-list-of-aus)
